Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and this is one of the most surreal Thanksgivings I remember. I don't remember another. Just this. This, with the Native Americans we are 'celebrating our friendship' with tomorrow getting water cannoned and having their arms blown off at Standing Rock. This, with our President Elect Donald Orange Trump waiting in the wings to step into the White House. I was with Ever in town and boys and men waving large American flags were chanting BUILD THE WALL and yelling Trump and fucking liberals and I got back in the car and drove home crying. This, strange new world. This, when two of our children are not children at all, but men of 20 and 22 years old. How? Time, of course. Forward.
I am going to lessen my Zoloft. I feel too distant from my body. I am not anxious nor having panic attacks and I fall asleep at night, instead of laying in a light sweat and weeping over babies crying in cribs, as I have spent many nights doing, BUT. But I don't feel much. Detached, dissociated, drugged. American?
Tomorrow I will cut 25% of my oblong blue pill and along with the adrenaline I summon my tears, raucous laughter, love, lust, easy orgasm.
Tonight, I sleep.
My Published Memoir
About The Writer
Connect
"What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life? The world would split open " M.R.
she's precocious / and she knows just what it takes / to make the pros blush
The Mr. & Mrs.
what i thought love was is so much less than what it is
Our Pack: Dakota Wolf, Lola Moon, Ian Oliver and our baby, Ever Elizabeth
Someone may have stolen your dream when it was young and fresh and you were innocent. Anger is natural. Grief is appropriate. Healing is mandatory. Restoration is possible. -Jane Rubietta
you can stand under my umbrella
the light is on for you
My dear child, who can tell? One can only tell that, by remembering something which happened where we lived before; and as we remember nothing, we know nothing about it; and no book, and no man, can ever tell us certainly.
Some couples don’t ask much of one another after they’ve worked out the fundamentals of jobs and children. Some live separate intellectual and cultural lives, and survive, but the most intense, most fulfilling marriages need, I think, to struggle toward some kind of ideological convergence. Norman Rush
Pray For Kate McRae
click for link
I Believe In Nationwide Health Care
E Pluribus Unum ( Out of Many, One )
"I pay no attention whatever to anybody's praise or blame. I simply follow my own feelings." - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
Post a Comment