Varying Possibilities of choice for Handling Stress With Varying Degrees of Success
1 Random, Tourette like outbursts of inappropriate words, jokes or stories.
IE: ' Pussy! Pussssyyyy pussypussypussypussypussy! '
' Well. Surely Maggie was referring to her ailing cat at home. Regarding your taxes... '
2 Dancing
Yes.
3 Woody Allen movies
See Deconstructing Harry, Hannah and Her Sisters, Manhattan
4 Screaming orgasm
Comment: rough with children at home
5 Slapping face repeatedly with own hand
See American Beauty
Comment: painful, and difficult to explain later
6 Self indulgent morose or moody music listening
See Morrissey, The Cure, Enya, Joy Division, the entire Bruce Springsteen CD ' Nebraska '
Comment: painful but can be comforting and cathartic
7 Consumption of large amounts of chocolate and caffeine
Side Effects: embarrassing sweating, flushing, hot flashes, uncontrollable weeping and weight gain
8 Pot smoking, morbid fantasizing about own death and if funeral goers will wear half shirts
See Reality Bites
9 Gathering every person you love as near as you can, holding on as tightly as you can for long as you can and telling them you love them
Comment: Highly recommended
Side Effects: Possible severe discomfort if the UPS man had no idea how you felt.
xo
