Saturday, July 2, 2011

to all ye who visit here

everyone who comes here to read is welcome. everyone except my father. and he probably reads, anyhow. now in the past months i have been made aware that people all around me are reading: my friends, my workmates, my mom has stopped by, my son's friend who texted him to say first, that my writing was amazing, and then later, did he know that I had written about having sex with Mr. Curry on the bathroom floor?
so this is the thing I have to say to move far away from it because it makes my heart sticks to my ribs like an overcooked chicken: this blog is R rated, my writing is R rated and sometimes pornographic and sometimes gross and sometimes full of grief or tears or raucous laughter and sometimes saturated with love and sometimes small and still and sometimes all things or nothing or a dream i remembered from last year in spring. my writing is Philip Roth marrying Sylvia Plath and adopting Anne Lamott. it is adult life, told hnt religious experience, my companion through life. writing is also the way i'm going to take my family and lift them up and out of this life we live that is a constant, constant struggle to get by and make it, because we don't make enough money to make it.
onestly, and that- regardless of the type of adult life, even monks do things that are strange and unsettling ( or especially monks )- is what makes me me, and if you don't like it, if it offends you or unsettles you or you think it's ridiculous or if you are my son's friends and think it's oh my god like, whatever, then please don't tell me about it. for the love of god. i can't write with real life, real time feedback. i don't want it. i don't like it. so don't read if you don't like it, or read it and keep it to yourself. please.
it's such a small thing i'm asking you, and it means EVERYTHING to me. writing is my therapy, my yoga, my transcende

. my writing is, and even as a kid was, authentic, I am so proud to say, when I feel so insecure and failing at everything right now- my writing is what I know what I have an intrinsic, instinctive love and gift for, it has gotten me through times in my life where I felt real despair, it has literally helped me to reshape the person I am into someone more like who I want to be. i need it.
thank you.
Maggie May said...

to specify: it's the real life person in front of me commenting i'm referring to. not commenting here, which is awesome and like most bloggers, i'm a total addict of. xo

Brigindo said...

and it (your authentic R-rated voice) is why we love you so.

Maggie May said...

thank you B!!

i have to add a hilarious side note:

i talked to Dakota about this, and i said, " Well at least I'm not a Hooters girl, or a porn star! It could be worse. I mean, think of Julianne Moore. She's an actress who has shown her vagina on screen. Must be hard for her kids. "

Dakota said " Yeah Mom but her kids can be like, 'Yeah, you saw my mom's privates, but she's a famous movie star and I'm hella rich, so I don't give a crap! '

He then kindly added " I mean, I know that sucks to hear Mom. "

Oh my God my kids crack me up.

Lone Star Ma said...

I love your r-rated voice, too!

She Looks Like a Mom said...

The funny thing about people who read things they don't like, and then feel the need to leave nasty comments to the author, is that they had a choice to not read it in the first place. It is so easy to browse away from offending material, there is so much else on the internet to occupy one's time, so why do they get upset that they read something disagreeable? No one forced them to read it. I'll never understand. And you, dear lady, owe it to yourself and your readership to be authentic. Keep bringing the good stuff.

Ms. Moon said...

Amen love.

Amelia said...

I'm so much better with a keyboard then I am face to face.
I very much enjoy your voice, especially when talking about your kid's friends talking about you getting busy on your bathroom floor. That just made me laugh out loud, and then sympathize greatly. With you. Not him. ;)

Simply Mel {Reverie} said...

your raw writing is beautiful in every way...never change.

Wendy said...

You say this: 'it has gotten me through times in my life where I felt real despair, it has literally helped me to reshape the person I am into someone more like who I want to be. i need it.' and that is almost exactly what I would say about YOUR writing and what it does for me--how it shakes words loose for me, opens me up & breaks my heart. I love your blog & thank you for it.

Petit fleur said...

Oh my.

I can see how that would be erm, unsettling.

Oh my!

As per usual you manage the bumps in life with grace and humor. It's a gift Maggie, a real gift.

Keep on bringing the R baby!
Love you so,
pf

Loredana said...

I'm gonna keep reading because you are the only one so far I've met on here that truly believes in her writing and that it will take her further than any place she could dream of. You inspire me to push back my thoughts of "writing can't get you anywhere" (things my mother would say).

BRING IT ON FULL FORCE SISTA!!

Drax said...

"...but SHE's a famous MOVIE STAR... HELLA rich... yadda yadda yadda..."

Oh, just you wait, kids. Just you wait for the strange beautiful pulsing star of Maggie May Ethridge to ascend over the land and obliterate the planet!!! The oceans will boil with the heat of her words, cities will melt under the passion of her prose!!! Just you WAIT. Fame, bah!

silverfinofhope said...

Pretty lady, I know you won't, but please for the love of all that's holy don't filter, ever ever ever don't you filter a bit.

One time at work when I walked past a co-worker's desk my blog was on her monitor. That was super weird.

swonderful said...

oh yeah. real life people reading my blog and then discussing things with me with a funny judgement is running me away from my own space, now. but for me it isn't R rated stuff, it's just, "oh how cute that you take that thing/yourself/that situation so SERIOUSLY, HAH HAH."

your honesty and openness is what makes you you. XO

The Chicken's Consigliere said...

I think you are pretty brave. I've never been totally, but used to be a lot more, open. Then I had this weird thought about dying tomorrow and my blog being out there as my last word, and I didn't want my kids to remember me that way, regardless of how real it felt. It takes guts to be totally out there. I give you credit. I think you'll make it where you want to go.

Ida Mae said...

i love your writing
the end

clearness said...

I should link back to this because it's oh so true. It is hard to have real life people reading and talking about your stuff. Too personal. Our thoughts are peculiar things.

RottenMom said...

I love you just the way you are. Sex on the bathroom floor descriptions and all.

We had a similar experience with one of my sons friends. Read my blog then gave a play by play at the lunch table every day. Awkward for sure.

Thanks for your comment on my blog today. We all have to support each other, you know, differences and all. XO

Middle Child said...

I know where you are coming from. After my husband was killed and even before when he was really sick or sleeping the blog was a lifeline where I could tell stories and expand thoughts...after he was killed two sets of relatives decided to go through all my writing with a fine tooth comb and of course didn't like what I had written - at a time when I was grieving my wonderful man - they descended like a pack of demons and life was almost unliveable - I got around them by leaving them out - so I can still post but not the same as it was - please don't change your writing - it is fresh, insightful, beautiful and most important REAL!

michelle said...

BRAVO!

xoxoxo

Lindsey said...

I'm familiar with the abrupt, stop-in-my-tracks feeling of some real life person saying something, with a judgy tone to it, regarding my blog.
And to that I say: YUCK.
And: Shut up!!
I love your voice, love love love it, and am so glad you are writing. Do not stop.
xox

YES Gallery + Studio said...

"writing is also the way i'm going to take my family and lift them up and out of this life we live" AMEN, Maggie. Sing it loud and often. KNOW IT. xo

Jason, as himself said...

I agree with the others here. Your voice makes me come back and again and again.

American in Bath said...

Visiting from the Jason show. Staying because I like the writing. Thanks for reminding me why I write.

Caroline of Salsa Pie said...

Writing is your Art, Maggie.We all need our art.

I love what you write and although I've never met you, I consider you to be one of my favorite people on this planet.

Sending love to you, my friend. Keep on rocking as you always do. xo

Therese said...

It was a happy thing to hear you recognize and honour your gift. Don't let anyone's presence or perspective infringe on it. Rock on.

Now I'm dying to know - what do you consider "unwritable" material?

pureklass said...

You are lovely!

Mwa said...

Well, I love your writing and it doesn't unsettle me at all. It does the opposite, because it makes me see that we're all struggling and trying our best and it isn't easy for any of us. And then there's the overwhelming love, of course. I'm not making sense. I hope you know what I mean.

Sadie said...

Ah, and this is sorta why I blog with a pseudonym. But I mostly do that so I can talk shit about people and not get in trouble. :)

That Uncomfortable Itch said...

Yes, there is nothing quite like the breeze blowing on your naked hind side when you realize people know are reading your blog -only until that very moment you thought you typed in secret.

SJ said...

I love you.

tiffany said...

Maggie, I applaud you. The very reason yours and Mrs. Moon's blogs are my absolute favorites are because you both keep it real. Thank you for that.

marthagoudey said...

I bow to your authenticity. It is a joy to read...it makes me weep...

Sarah B said...

Your real, raw, Rated R voice is a gift. Sharing it with us is an even bigger gift. Your posts are a cluster of fireflies that illuminate the difficult path of becoming and being the authentic person I want (and have been so afraid) to become. It is not an easy path, so I thankyou thankyou thankyou for being on it and living to tell about it.

femamom.com said...

A writing teacher once told me that you must write for yourself, unapologetically. I respect you tremendously for doing this on your blog. I think all your readers do.

Shelley E said...

I love your writing...

and I don't understand why people find it necessary to make comments about something that don't like on someone else's blog- it's their blog- don't read it if you don't like it!

mosey said...

You are why I love to visit here, r-rated and all!

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