things i've invented this week

tee shirt : I'm The Only Slut In This Town*
* inspired by Mr. Curry and my viewing, and ensuing flash of possessive jealousy,
of a hot young lady riding the back of a fast motorcycle with tight jeans, a tramp stamp
and a black g-string made completely visable by the pull of her rear against the denim
as she hunched forward to hold her boyfriend as they weaved between cars

porn film : Highway Sluts On lonely highways, hot women in fast cars crash into each other,
finding in rage a new lesbian lust, tearing off each other's clothing and taking
each other on and in machines
* cars of use should be classic and tough, old Novas and Mustangs etc.
* also inspired by Mr. Curry and ensuing conversation after viewing
a hot young lady riding the back of a fast motorcycle with tight jeans,
a tramp stamp and a black g-string made completely visable by the pull
of her rear against the denim as she hunched forward to hold her boyfriend
as they weaved between cars

creative art for daughter : make cat/kitten toys with various papers, glues, scissors and color
for our 6 ( Mr. Curry, your love knows no bounds ) Harry, Hagrid,
Hermione, Mr. Weasley, Bellatrix and Kagome

tip for not puking while cleaning daughter's prodigious puke from comforter 2am: close eyes*
* probably not invented by author

ways to keep husband happy after 7 years of marriage: love notes in red lipstick on mirror* creative use of new toothbrush and honey, kisses on eyes and cheeks*, jasmine
perfume*, cheerfully watching bad action movie on couch*, silence when husband
does not clean up cat poop in corner even after being the one to see it happen*
* probably not actually invented by author

breast milk storage: create a funnel on both sides of plastic bag for freezing, storing and pouring
breast milk so that those pouring breast milk into bottle for infant* do not spill
other woman's breast milk* on arms clothing or floor
* infant most likely screaming
* while author herself breastfed all her babies for 2 years each and completely
supports breastfeeding, author does not deny the gross factor in spilling another
human being's bodily fluids on her person, being that in our society we are taught
from young age that all human bodily fluids or excrements are disgusting, ie: ear
wax, shit, urine, yeast from infection, snot, saliva, mucus, blood, toe jam, etc.

Mr. Curry and the Crazies

if you can't pick up the crying baby of your past, maybe the love you create in the present can make it's way across the room and do it for you.

Mr. Curry is my husband, meet a man who lovingly supports me through the Crazies that occur inside me when my past rears it's head and takes over what was a normal, sweet mannered suburban mom, wife, writer. he's been amazing this last week, doing most of the disciplining, the driving (which is legend, with three children all in school and various activities) and the holding of one upset wife when the kids are gone.

Mr. Curry is my best friend and my love. i have known him since i was 18. i have never met anyone in my life i could spend so much time with and still enjoy it. there is nothing i do, (ok not NOTHING, but...:) that isn't bettered or enhanced with his presence. driving is better when he's in the seat next to me. grocery shopping is better when he's walking next to me. we laugh so much! this is a great force against the Crazies. laugh. we laugh a lot in our house.

and ... you know...there is between the sheets. i am a Scorpio, and a writer, and a woman. the activities of love are part of my marrow, and Mr. Curry and i have sparks to light a forest fire.
sometimes the kids are all in the far sunroom and i drag him, or he drags me, into the bedroom, lock the door, and try not to giggle as we hurry up before someone realizes we are actually enjoying time without them. we call this the kids sensing a disturbance in the Force.

i have so much to be thankful for. the Crazies and the Darkness unfortunately have a large place in my life, my childhood was terribly sad and scary. but the present is not. it is the challange of the Crazies to drag myself into the present and force my eyes open LOOK.

LOOK what you HAVE.