Saturday, March 29, 2014


do you think about me, the way i used to be
when i was still me.
before the bankrupt business, the 
broken pelvis 
fat of scars and blood, the baby in the
hospital, the 
internal fracturing of self worth
with all that is lost.
brain on fire, calls on Sunday
overdue bill
before nine to five became day to night.
do you think of me. the way i used to be.
when we were still we.
the corners of night that were ours alone
the way your face changed for me
the meaning of home.
your face unmasked in love
more like a child and more like a man
than ever before, finally
that thing we run for
a wholeness. love so tender
we shook sliding into bed.
our eyes together and we ticked off
the things we were no longer afraid of:
death, disease, disaster.
the night before we married
you said ' just keep your eyes on me,
like its always been. '
of course you were right, 
i did not tremble beneath the veil
but stared into the sun bold and yellow.
remember that day, 
the ocean crashed like hands clapping.
we stood in the wind, being photographed
i thought i might feel like a wild thing
in a trap
but i have never felt so free.
i knew i was heading straight into the arms of love.
my sweetheart, my love
sometimes in the dark nursing heart of night,
i think of how we used to be
your hands on my rib cage like a wedding ring
your eyes alight with the matter of the beyond sky
and the waves are making sounds like crying
behind the veil that blows on our wedding day.

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