Thursday, November 18, 2010

i can totally do this pregnancy thing as long as i have to.

..... fine!! it's a blatent lie i'm telling myself, but we all have to get through the day.

my take on Madonna's What It Feels Like To Be A Girl
redux: What It Feels Like To Be 38 Weeks

stomach like a water balloon filled by adolescent boys
(now that sounds plain wrong oh hells)

peeing every half hour it feels like someone is tweaking my bladder
with Pamela Anderson fingernails

i cannot sleep without something between my legs
( now that doesn't sound good )

i have the sex drive of a teenage girl
but can't reach the goods beneath the hood

my hips are ripped and my abs are shot
stretched to the point of oh hell no

my breasts inflate and make me hate
that i've 10 more days to go

because engorgement is not your friend
when it creeps in private places

and everyone looks at you like an animal in the zoo
and you want to pinch their faces

do you know? what it feels like, for a girl?
do you know? what it feels like in this world
when your body is huge and your skin is not smooth
and you'd rather be drooling in bed
take a chance and eat elephants
and get a glimpse into my head
do you know??

(i'm so sorry Madonna.)



clearness said...

I love this! Made me laugh as I had many of the same feelings at around the same point of pregnancy.

Ms. Moon said...

Oh yes. I know. And oh, baby. These will be the longest days of your life. And some of the most precious, too, somehow.
You can do it. You will do it. It is going to be SO worth it. I am thinking of you all the time.
Love...Mary

Angella Lister said...

Dear God, I remember! I remember at the end, I thought I would be pregnant for the rest of my life. I know you think I'm exaggerating. But I'm really not.

Kara Hoag said...

Haha, nice. That sounds awful, though!

karahoag.blogspot.com

Still Life With Coffee said...

hee hee... memories.
Thanks for letting me re-live them.

Terresa said...

I have pictures of myself 40 weeks pregnant with twins. Here's the link in case you want a good laugh (or cry). :)

PS: You can do it, girl! You're almost there!!!

http://thechocolatechipwaffle.blogspot.com/2010/02/poem-homage-to-lucille-clifton.html

Maggie May said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Maggie May said...

i just looked at those, Terresa, amazing that your body could do that! you looked gorgeous, like a goddess. i mean pregnancy is A.MAzING. i never stop feeling in awe of what my body is doing.

i think i will be able to relax into it better, accept it more, after this weekend. we are finishing up the very final acts of 'getting ready'- the carpet cleaner comes in the morning and we spent (mostly Mr. Curry but Lola and I did small things) all evening getting everything moved into the kitchen and out of hte living room and master bedroom

then hopefully Mr. Curry can paint the master bedroom, and then! the new mattress my mom bought us (yay mom!) and our furniture can be put into the master bedroom

and then

SIGH oF RELIEF

:)

Caroline of Salsa Pie said...

Bravo!!!! I hear you sister. Loved this and thinking of you.

modaspia said...

i'm so happy for you maggie and have been thinking of you..
thanks for stopping by yesterday. i do remember that you were 19 and that's stayed with me. i don't know too many people with the same relationship age-wise as me and my mom. you and D will always be close that way and everything that brings. i feel blessed.

Petit fleur said...

You describe it perfectly!

I remember people (Men and women alike making all sorts of inappropriate comments about my breasts. It was beyond rude!) Lets not talk about people wanting to touch the belly. I had to deck a few fools.

I remember also feeling like I was going to be pregnant for the rest of my life and hardly remembering what it felt like to not be sharing my body. sigh.

Oh Maggie, your sense of humor will carry you a long way, no matter how big you may get! Your humor and your words. Those are graceful and reassuring part of you that stays consistent, no matter how the externals of life may change. Thanks for sharing...
xo

Marion said...

How well I remember those last weeks. OY! The misery and that baby on the bladder!! I truly feel for you. But even still, revel in the joy and wonder of it (as hard as that is to do). I loved being pregnant...it felt like pure joy.

Madonna ain't got nothing on you, Maggie May.

Love & Blessings,

Marion

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I don't know how it feels, but it did make me laugh.

Ellen said...

Ripeness. Having to wait..and wait..and yes I do remember the looks people gave when you are out in public. Like they are afraid you will give birth right in front of them!

thenextarrow said...

haha this is wonderful!

xo Alison

Darcy said...

ur almost there! I just had my little boy two months ago and TOTALLY feel your pain! just days away you are.....

Mwa said...

I do know what it feels like for a girl. Except for the early engorgement. Must be very reassuring, though. I always have to let my babies go hungry for the first few days. Would have preferred an abundance of milk, I think.

Not long now!

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