I'm so sick. The happiness over this little tiny growing babe inside me is on Mute, pressed down with the consant, ever present naseua I am feeling, which let's up occasionally so that I can realize even more deeply and happily that I am pregnant! And my heart quickens and I put my hand to my stomach and I think about our morning routine and how much earlier I'll have to get up, and hm maybe I could put the baby mat here, and look at how excited Lola is and oh my gosh Dakota will be in college before the baby is in kindergarten, and oh my god the love of a baby, car seats, stroller, nursing, co-sleeping, the birth, my scar tissue from endometriosis, I got pregnant after Stage Four endometriosis! my insurance, calling Mr. Curry and telling him and his happiness so great he can't get to sleep at night, the children talking about names and what they like and don't, a Christmas approaching with a new baby in the house! the smell of my babies, oh shit I gave all my birthing and labor books away over the years, I am already grown out of most of my pants, my breasts are slightly bigger and my bras getting tight, my ass bigger, no fucking WONDER I wasn't losing any weight I was so puzzled why my excercising was making my stomach BIGGER, my mom is so happy, my work girlfriends the most supportive and loving and sweet girls I could have ever dreamed of working with, my whole family happy, my eyes sweep the living room and already I can see the baby, here in Daddy's arms, here on his/her mat cooing, here in my arms screaming, there in a sibling's lap.
A baby. A new baby. Our new baby.!!!!
We got a new car after mine went finished. This one is adorable and a small black SUV with less than 100,000 miles on it and in perfect shape. We got an amazing deal, too, through Mr. Curry's cousin Rob. :)
Meanwhile I'm too sick to read, to be online for more than a few minutes at a time, to talk on the phone, to go to Mr. Curry's grandparent's sixtieth anniversary dinner tonight. Mr. Curry took our three children and I'm here.
Duration of Pregnancy: 9 months
Times Thrown Up Daily: 2
Days in 9 months: 270 average
Amount of possible puking left to do: 540
Amount of times people have already said they think it's twins: 4
Amount of times I've peed myself while throwing up: 2
I've never been this naseaus with a pregnancy. All day, every hour of every day, even when I wake up at night. Terrific cravings that make no sense, which I've never experienced before.
Actually desired avacados and hot dogs the other night? GROSS. I don't even LIKE hot dogs.
Episodes of past vomiting before confirmed pregnant that now make sense: 2
Episodes of flushing and exhaustion "" : 4
Times Mr. Curry has kissed my belly since confirmation: 5
Times Dakota has called me Preggo my Eggo: 5
Times Mr. Curry has driven to get something to help with my stomach: 5
Amount of minutes in the day I thinkortalk about baby names: 180
Yes, I've tried: Ginger Ale, Saltines, Coke (i'm so sorry, baby!) Sprite, Protien, eating crackers for 20 minutes before exiting bed, praying to God over the toilet, sipping water and walking. Coke, Saltines and eating before getting up help a little.
I have not been to the OBGYN yet, and can't wait to find out the due date. We are thinking I might be 2and1/2 months along, but we'll see.
Things that will change with this pregnancy: I will learn how to spell nasueas (nope, not it)
One month ago: I was pretty sure I'd never be able to get pregnant, after two separate doctors telling me the chances were highely unlikely due to Stage Four Endometriosis and three prior surgeries on my abdomen and left ovary, My car had exploded and whimpered away in a puff of smoke, and we had no idea how to navigate a down payment for a new one.
Now: I am pregnant and driving the cutest car I've ever owned.
You never know.