Monday, January 5, 2009

Top Ten Reasons Why I Can't Go To Work Today

' i cannot go to school today
said little peggy anne mckay
i have the measles and the mumps
a gash a rash and purple bumps!'
- Shel Silverstein

1 my eye bags are particularly offensive this morning.

2 i have coffee breath and dropped my toothbrush in the toilet.

3 my cat peed in my purse, de-activating my car lock, and i can't get in my car.

4 my children are becoming enslaved to the establishment and i need to free them
from the puritanical expectations of organized education, and i don't want to go to work.

5 i'm going to be late anyway.

6 how will i ever chisel my body into a sparkling statue of Greek Goddess perfection
if i can't find time for 5 Minute Abs?

7 i have a hangnail. ouch.

8 if i call my husband right now, i bet he'll come home to get some.

9 the phone is ringing.

10 my real life doesn't involve group urination.


xo
ps
i don't want to go to work today
said little maggie may

sigh.
GROW UP GIRL.
TURD BURGLAR!!!!!
Vashti said...

Maqggie you have just made me laugh out loud! Thankyou!
Have a great day anyway.

scribbledout said...

Oh my gosh. What an insane list. I hope you didn't go to work :( lol. Or if you did, I hoped you look like a greece goddess!

Cat said...

I wish I had thought of ANY of those before I left for work this morning. Damn.

I almost didn't make it up the icy hill from our underground garage. I almost slid backwards through the garage door, actually.

Lola said...

All very valid reasons! I feel your pain, except the cat peeing in my purse that is ;) I hate to go to work as much as my son hates to go to school. Makes for loverly mornings 'round here.

Talia said...

Your cat really did that?

Maggie May said...

no, my cat didn't really do that. my DOG really did pee not once, not twice, but three times on my couch cover in the last few months though. :)

Lola i know. nice example we are.

Cat ice freaks me OUT. i guess i'm a cliched Californian that way. it's terrifying how you just...drift...on it. i'm glad you are ok and reporting for duty!

Collin Kelley said...

I had tonsillitis so no work for me today, but I would have rather gone there than sit in the doctor's office most of the day. sigh.

Miss Grace said...

The cat peeing in your purse is unequivocally the worst.

Miss Grace said...

Or best, depending.

a cat of impossible colour said...

Haha, brilliant!

Danette said...

Wonderful reasons! Any reason is a good reason to take a day off.

I think I will take a day off today!!

Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving a comment. I will be back to visit you.

Annie King said...

I wish I had a good excuse today. I go in this afternoon for a fun training, but still... books, hobbies, writing, and sleep call to me.

Shelby said...

You're too funny! I love this. And I LOVE Shel Silverstein. I still have several of his books.

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